“Sir, I’m sorry….the press got wind of our plan to ensure the nation’s school children are in line with you.”

“What?  How did that happen?”

“Sorry, sir.  Must be another security deal.  I’ll get the staff working on the re-write we promised.”

“It’s hard, but I’m keepin’ it cool.  See how cool I am in these shades?”

“Come on, Van.  You didn’t really say all those things on tape did you?  You’re just playin’ with me.”

“Of course I did.  Hell, I even said them to you when we met.  Don’t you remember?

“What?”

“You didn’t really sign that truther thing, did you?”

“Oh, you know I did.  Who didn’t?”

“Crap.”

“Hillary, do you think a billboard with this picture will help me get over the Van hurdle?”

“No, Barack.  I don’t think so.”

“How about this picture?  It shows I’ve got it all under control.  Maybe then they’ll overlook my Czars’ indiscretions and buy off on our takeover of health care.  Right?”

“Um…sorry.  I don’t think so.  There’s no hope for you now.”

“Mr. President.  I just want to make damn sure you don’t come into our chamber and get rid of the public option.  I WILL NOT ALLOW A BILL TO PASS WITHOUT IT!!”

“Shut up, Nancy.  I have enough problems to deal with.  You’ll take what you get and be glad you got it.”

“Hey, Bob.  Is there any way we can make our new jobs claims believable?  Any way at all?”

“Um…no, I don’t think so, sir.”

“Dear Lord, please don’t let Fox find out any more details on my Czars’ questionable backgrounds.”

Meanwhile at the daily briefing…”Hey Robert.  Do you have any comments on the new YouTube videos that came out today showing…”

“Wait, wait, wait guys.  I told you I plead the 5th on any video evidence regarding unvetted high ranking government officials making questionable comments on video or any controversial petitions or documents they may or may not have signed and whether or not they knew what the documents said when they signed them.”

Meanwhile, back in the oval office…

“Mr. President, I’ve got my white board in the car with all the latest poll numbers and details on the stimulus package.  I’d be happy to go get it and review them with you.”

“Shut up, Karl.”

1.  The Boy is back from debate camp.  Two weeks in a college dorm just north of us.  We got to see him half way through for lunch.  He says he had fun and placed respectably in the tournament.

2.  I really don’t know what to think of Sarah Palin resigning.  Other than to say I wonder why it’s okay to make viscious attacks against her kids, but kids of other elected officials are stricly off-limits.  Funny, that…

3.  On the world stage.  Believe me, I thought I would NEVER in a million years say this…I would feel much safer if Hillary were president.  I just get the feeling that Obama may be just making it up as he goes along and does not have a clue.  But time will tell.

4.  How much longer until we admit that Obama has worsened the economic situation he “inherited” instead of looking back and blaming all the money-spending on Bush.  Bush is no longer in charge…at least I thought he wasn’t.  Maybe I’m wrong….

5.  I find it funny that the vast majority of cars which qualify for purchase under the “clunkers for cash” program are foreign, while the government bought GM.  Does this make sense to you?  It’s like they’re just giving our money away to our new competition, since we all (well, all of us that actually pay taxes) now own a piece of GM.

6.  Our garden got hammered by the tornado a few weeks ago.  But the cucumbers survived and are producing, and we have a couple tomatoes.  The peppers keep having blooms which fall off and never amount to anything.  Maybe it was all too much for them…that, or all the weeding I do around them.  Can’t stand weeds.  Hate ‘em.

7.  I had the house to myself for almost five days last week while The Boy was at camp and the spouse was flying.  Very peaceful, those few days alone.  But also (surprisingly) busy.  Lots of weeds to pull, don’tcha know.

8.  The Boy turns 15 this week, and he also starts driving this week (being parent-taught by The Spouse).  One more year and he’ll be able to drive himself to and from tournaments!

9.  I’ve been counting calories.  Each and every one I eat or drink.  This is a tedious, time intensive process at times.  But….I’ve lost about 12 pounds give or take in the last three months.  Slow and steady wins the race!

10.  The best part about counting calories is I don’t have to totally deny myself anything…including fast food and alcohol…I just have to plan for it.

11.  It’s surprising how burning many calories working out each week will allow you to eat more calories and still lose weight.

12.  I know 4,200 calories sounds like a lot to have to burn, but did you know if you clean your house all in one day you will burn many, many, many calories?  And then…you will get to have wine after cleaning!

13.  Did I say I was worried about international events and the economy?

14.  Did I mention that I don’t want to be forced to put mercury-laden “green” light bulbs in my house?

15.  Well I am and I don’t.

16.  Did anyone notice that unemployment is higher than it’s been in more than two decades?  I’m just sayin’….does it make sense to throw good money after bad vs. letting the economy correct itself like it’s supposed to?

That is all.

1.  Tommy is at training for a month.  I have trouble sleeping when he’s on trips.  I have even more trouble when he’s away at training.

2.  North Korea, China, and Iran.

3.  The lack of focus in this new administration on the economy and the fact they don’t seem to be too worried about hiring people to fill the Department of the Treasury.  I guess funding stem cell research with money we don’t have is more important?

4.  That former guest of Gitmo (circa 2007) that is now an operational leader for the Taliban.

5.  Our new people at the State Department and how they are treating Great Britain and downplaying human rights issues.

6.  The fact that it is getting really windy outside and our neighbor’s fence is falling apart with many sections and boards currently hitting each other, back and forth, that sound ready to fly through the windows on one side of our house at any moment.

How about y’all?  Sleeping well lately?  Without the aid of alcohol or other substances to calm the nerves our current situations on amany fronts cause?  If so, I applaud you.  I am not that worry-free these days….

And if I’m being honest…finishing the last half of a nice bottle of red…..I found the following stories…um…”interesting”….

An 82-year-old man who slipped and fell in the bathtub of his Salt Lake City home says he was trapped there for five days.

Ummm……I wouldn’t say if you’re old don’t take a bath without supervision, but dayammmmmm.

An outbreak of salmonella food poisoning has made 388 people sick across 42 states…

Word to the wise…WASH YOUR FOOD AND COOK IT THOROUGHLY, PEOPLE!  We can’t trust suppliers to observe proper hygiene and handling.  Get with the program!

Things were so bad last year that a single Toyota model, the Camry/Solara midsize car, outsold the entire fleet of Chrysler LLC’s passenger cars.

Still think big company bailouts are a good idea?  I’m hoping you don’t….

A New York doctor who gave his wife a kidney is suing her for $1.5 million — or the return of the vital organ — after he says she cheated on him with a physical therapist.

Bad form, both of you.  To the wife – did you really have to cheat on the guy that saved your live?  To the husband – the money will not get you that kidney back.  Drop it and move on.

A federal judge ordered an Alabama sheriff locked up in his own jail Wednesday after holding him in contempt for failing to adequately feed inmates….

Dude, ya gotta feed the prisoners.  Or pay the price, it seems…

A man who claimed to have a bomb aboard a Los Angeles-bound jetliner and was then tackled and bound by other passengers….

You GO, “other passengers”.  I don’t care if he was found innocent, the very threat warranted decisive action.

Adult entertainment industry wants a bailout.

Really?  I’m hoping things don’t get down to that level, but who knows with who’s in charge of Congress now….

The U.S. Army apologized Wednesday for sending 7,000 letters to family members of soldiers killed in Iraq and Afghanistan — and addressing the letters to “John Doe.”

Some contractors don’t have the best quality control, even those that handle such sensitive tasks.  Bad form, contractor that worked on those letters!

If your fare drops within 24 hours, your airline might refund the difference.

It pays to be anal about recent airline purchases!

Mexico Fights Disgarded Gum Problem By Telling People to Swallow it.

Ummm…didn’t our mothers always tell us to NEVER do this?  Do you still do it?

The wine is gone and I’m off to bed.  G’night.

SO sad.  It’s never easy to lose a child.

Oh, B-Man.  Ya got caught.  Giving away shares as “Christmas” or “Holiday” gifts will not get you out of this one.  Oh well…the only good thing about this is some far-left Hollywood types will now have less to give to political campaigns.

A few things:

a.  I am duly impressed the scandal was supressed until Obama was elected.  Kudos to those operatives that made that happen.  I gotta take my hat off to them.

b.  Guilty?  Yes.  Does Fitzgerald have enough to prove it?  My feeling is that if he did he would not have asked for an extension.

c.  Will he be impeached?  Yes.  Does the evidence support it?  Depends on what the government lets them use.

d.  He reminds me of some low-level mafia guy trying to make his mark and get noticed.

e.  Did ya see the SNL skit on him?  Hilarious!

f.  Personally, I think this guy has the biggest ego on the planet.  Hubris walking.  Also, he is an a-hole.

g.  When I called my cousin the day of the Fitzgerald press conference…..she was HORRIFIED!  I have to say I would have had the same reaction.  Poor kid.  I feel for her living in that state – the motherland of political corruption.

Speaking of corruption….

Why is it that every single politician out there is corrupt on some level, but there seems to be a cloud of corruption surrounding this appointment and the following appointment.  What gives?  We had previously the Jefferson freezer corruption money….do democrats just not know how not to get caught?  I won’t even mention Travelgate and Whitewater and the Blue Dress…because what’s the point?  People either don’t know or don’t care, given the early numbers from the latest election.

To say Burris’ little visit to the Senate today was grandstanding would be an understatement.  I mean…he didn’t even have all the proper signatures on his paperwork!  But still…Bobo has not been convicted, impeached, or removed.  Currently, it’s his right and responsibility to approve whomever he chooses.  Personally, I think Bobo’s advisers told him to appoint the one guy he did NOT have conversations with ANYONE about getting paid in some way for the appointment.

Really?  Is Minnesota THAT pissed at Bush?  Or (more likely) are Democrat election officials picking and choosing which votes to count and just don’t care who sees what they’re doing?  Given recent events, my guess is the latter…but that’s for the courts to decide since it’s now been screwed up beyond belief by partisans.

Um….yeah….well….I think that…..what I meant was…….uh……..well……you get the idea.  I don’t care how educated you are.  If you can’t speak you shouldn’t get the job.  No matter how important your dad and uncles were and are to the country.  You just don’t have it, babe.  Charity work?  Definitely your wheel house.  Stick with what you know and stop trying to cash in on your family name.

Please, please, PLEASE don’t send checks out to people who will only use the money to pay off the debt they so carelessly racked up and have not paid.  The money will NOT stimulate the economy, but will only serve to reward people for irresponsible behavior.  Also, I approve of most of your appointments so far.  Don’t screw it up.  Don’t deficit spend us into another great depression.  NO MORE BILLIONS OF STIMULUS PACKAGES.  Just let the economy work like it’s supposed to and stop bailing out businesses with poor plans.  Bad business models are SUPPOSED to fail.

Last but not least:

I don’t care who you are.  If someone fires rockets each and every day at your people, including schools, homes, military targets, etc……ya gotta defend yourself!  Oh, I know…the U.N. (THE most corrupt organization on the face of the earth) will say Israel should show restraint and discount the countless, daily rocket attacks by Hamas on Israel DURING AN AGREED UPON CEASEFIRE….but at what point do we decide as a world that it’s not okay to commit terrorist attacks on a daily basis, and it’s not okay for countries like Iran to bankroll the attacks?  COME ON!  The world needs to step up or all will be lost.

That is all.