Why is that some people seem to think that if they go to the gym for a few weeks at the end of February and the beginning of March, they will somehow magically wipe away the long months of eating poorly and letting their physiques atrophy into gelatinous masses of flab?

Every year it is the same thing. Right after Valentine's Day and before Spring Break, the same group of people show up, taking advantage of a year's worth of health club dues which they only redeem during these (what they
think) are key weeks of the year.

Note: This is the same group of people that used to show up after New Year's Day but now have pushed the window back a bit and wait until "After the Super Bowl".

But I digress. So anyway.....they come to the gym, stand around staring dumbly at this piece of equipment or that, and try to access those dim memories of actually knowing how to operate the machine.

I can't blame them for trying. At least they are there. They bothered to put gym clothes on, drive to the place and actually get themselves motivated enough to walk past the front desk.

However...(and you knew this was coming)....it would be really, really nice if they actually worked out while they were there instead of either going at a snail's pace, never breaking a sweat, on the treadmill or on the ellipticals...or sitting on equipment taking five to 10 minute breaks between their prescribed three sets...and....GET THE HELL OUT OF THE WAY OF US GYM RATS WHO BOTHER TO SHOW UP EACH AND EVERY WEEK FOR OUR TORTURE.

I guess what I'm trying to convey here...is something these people deep in their hearts already know. A few weeks a year does not undo all the neglect of and bad things they've put into their bodies. Either go...or don't go. I just wish they'd decide once and for all either way because it would make it SO much easier for me. And we all know it's all about ME.

I'm just sayin'....

So if you have a minute go take this test. Shouldn't take long at all.

'Kay? 'Kay.

1. We had Comcast service for cable and broadband.

2. We don't anymore.

3. Because it was expensive.

4. And I kept losing the signal to the router...several times a day and always at the most inconvenient times.

5. I lost some posts because of Comcast.

6. I did not like Comcast.

7. Cable companies in general are evil.

8. Comcast is losing the market - at least in our neighborhood - fast.

9. Because NOW there is something better, cheaper, and faster.

10. It is called Verizon FIOS.

11. It is glorious.

12. The cable picture is better, the broadband speed is faster, and I have not lost broadband signal at ALL in days.

13. Verizon FIOS TV comes with dual tuner DVRs.

14. I love dual tuner DVRs.

15. Not that I'm addicted to TV or anything...certainly NOT me.

16. We canceled our TiVo account.

17. But guess what? You can STILL use it to record shows and pause live TV. But you can't update your guide is all.

18. We updated our guide with Verizon info. before we canceled our TiVo service. Tommy's smart that way :).

19. Did I say I LOVE the dual tuner DVR? Now I can watch American Idol and record Deal or no Deal - AT THE SAME TIME.

20. For those of you which already have a dual tuner DVR...shut up. I'm excited. Don't spoil it for me.

21. I don't own an MP3 player and I rarely listen to music.

22. Except maybe if I'm cleaning.

23. Some would say I clean all the time so therefore I must listen to music all the time.

24. I don't clean all the time...just when something needs cleaning...oh....never mind.

25. We are early adopters of technology.

26. FIOS is so new they haven't even trained their techs on their new laptops which must be used to activate services on site at your house.

27. This must be why they schedule installs in four hour blocks of time...all that navigating through an unfamiliar program.

28. But that's OK, they hire talented guys and they figure it out eventually.

29. Our house is so wired that some nights we all sit at our respective computers and chat via IM as we do what we do on our own computers.

30. Yes, this includes the boy. Shut up, he is not spoiled rotten...spoiled maybe but certainly not rotten.

31. The HD DVR is cool too and it has its own dual tuner. Now Tommy can record hockey while he's away...oh boy.

32. Did I mention that the boy has a cable box in his room and TV recording software on his computer so he can also record shows and watch them back later on his monitor through his computer?

33. I TOLD you, he's not rotten. Just spoiled.

Those are my random thoughts on technology. Now I must go watch one thing while the DVR records another thing...just because I can.

I think I've covered here many times (even recently) about how much I hate to shop. Of all the things I hate to shop for, groceries definitely tops the list. It's time consuming, tedious, and then there are the other people you have to deal with.

On any given Sunday, the crowd at the grocery store was almost manageable. Although very slow, most would recognize when they were holding up traffic or were in someone else's way and would apologize and move accordingly...after all, it's Sunday and you're supposed to be at least courteous on that day, right?

Well.....all that changed when my grocer decided to put a Starbucks inside the store. Not attached to the store off to the side....not the next store front down. Oh, no....it's INSIDE the front door. Right there. Near the entrance. And it's Starbucks so there's always a line...of people....strung right across the main entry which you HAVE to pass through to get to the groceries.

Anyway...so now.....apparently Sunday has become a key coffee event for the very social church crowd in the area. They all show up either before or after services (or in between for those all day die-hard worshipers). They patiently chat and wait in line...get their beverage of choice...and then....they descend upon the general grocery shopping population.

First, can I just say that if they were going to put a Starbucks inside the store, they should have thought forward and provided carts with cup holders. Have you ever seen someone try to navigate a shopping cart one-handed whilst trying not to spill their grande mocha late' or whatever all over the place or on their nice church clothes? This is the definition of un-ergonomic, people.

They stop, swerve, stumble, trip when they do decide to move the cart a few inches forward....whilst sipping their coffee or chatting with the odd neighbor or their spouse right in front of the apples or rice or cheese or yogurt or whatever it is that I need to get to. And they are talking and chatting so loudly amongst themselves you have to shout to be heard above the fray so they will move out of my way so I can like, ya know....SHOP FOR MY DAMN GROCERIES!!!!!

Don't get me wrong. I'm all for church if that's your thing. And I am definitely all about Starbucks. And I know grocery shopping is a necessary evil. However....church social combined with Starbuck's and all that goes with it combined with grocery shopping and handling a shopping cart equals NO...FUN....FOR....ME!!!!

People....if you want to go to a church social...go to church. If you want to go to Starbucks...go to Starbucks. AND...if you want to go get groceries....get your damn groceries and get the friggin' Starbucks on your way OUT of the grocery store!!!!!

That is all.

I mean, if one is going to run off with a beer delivery truck, one ought to choose a truck containing better beer....like maybe Sam Adams or Heineken or something. I'm just sayin'....

Shopping. The mere mention of the word makes many women in my family run away in terror. Yes, we go against the grain that way. We HATE TO SHOP!!!. So much so that some of us wait until all pairs of underwear are nearly unsalvageable before we will brave the elements of the shopping environment to restock with new supplies...and even then some of us just can't bring ourselves to do it and so we order online....hoping for the best.

Well...today I had to shop. First because I was looking for an excuse not to go to the gym (yes, I was THAT desperate not to go to the gym). But second...when the spouse is away.....money must be spent. It's a rule (don't tell Tommy).

So...I did at least start the dishwasher and sort the clothes for laundry...I even started the first load. I took a long leisurely bath, actually put makeup on since I would be seen by the throes at the nearby outlet mall...and off I went to brave the general public. I went to the mall for one thing and one thing only...I am nearly out of shower gel and lotion. For most, this would be no big deal...just get it with your groceries. But for me...well...I am allergic to most stuff from the store I have tried, and to be perfectly honest I don't like the way any of it smells. So Bath and Body was the target. I got there relatively unscathed by the unemployed guys, teenagers skipping school, and stay at home moms with their endless stream of whining toddlers and crying babies. Oh yes, I got the buy three get one free! But...what do you buy? You go through the lotion quicker but you need the shower gel more...oh well. I figured it out.

Then it was off to our local Kohl's which is at least not a mall but still full of more stay at home moms and their offspring. Only...the cell conversations were louder as the store was less crowded so that was a nuisance. But I was there for one thing and one thing only....a new bathroom wastebasket to match my pretty new bluey violety bathroom paint...only.....they had PJ's on sale. So I got some new PJ bottoms...so then I had to get Scytheboy a novelty tee.

Not to worry...I found the wastebasket too. And all was bought for less than $50 (at least at Kohl's).

I was out for less than an hour total....but it was shopping...and I hated it. But at least now I have a nifty new trash can and am currently wearing freshly washed new PJ bottoms (get your mind out of the gutter...I have an old tee on too).

In summary...hate to shop...but had to shop....good news is I found an excuse not to go to the gym and arrived home in record time unscathed with all targets acquired...plus a few more.

A couple glasses of wine later I am fully recovered from the ordeal.

But I still and always will hate to shop.

Are you loyal to your dry cleaner? Do you go to the same one religiously, never thinking about what they do there or who works there? I would like to be that way, confident that when I drop Tommy's uniforms off, they will be clean and ready to go at the time promised.

However...I have not had the best of luck with dry cleaning establishments since we moved to Dallas. The first one I went to seemed very professional and everything was fine...only they were closed on Saturday and I had to turn left to return home. I hate turning left. And sometimes I needed the stuff on Saturday. So I switched to the cleaners on the other side of the road so I could turn right and pick up the clothes on Saturday.

Well.....the business changed hands a few months ago and things really went down hill. They only had one person working there that could barely speak English or make change...and this one person would leave at odd times during the day and close down the store for an hour or two. VERY inconvenient when you have that errand on your list and have to come back another time...especially if the spouse needs his uniforms that day for a trip.

So....I switched again. To another place (still one where I could turn right) that is near my nail place. This shop only accepts cash for orders less than $8 (which is really weird). One time I only had a $20, and they didn't have change so I had to dig around the car to try and find a few ones and some coins. A mostly cash only business...very strange. But I figured it was conveniently located so I would put up with it.

Then...last night Tommy was out so he went to pick up the uniforms...and the pants weren't done. They weren't going to be done until this morning. So I had to take the extra trip after dropping Scytheboy off. When I got there, nobody was at the counter and there was this weird gold shower curtain deal pulled shut so you couldn't see what was going on in the back of the place where they do the clothes. The girl came out from a side office (with a 2-way mirror that they can see out but you can't see in). Her hair was all messy like she'd just gotten out of bed and she had thrown a coat over her pajamas.

Very....very weird. I paid cash for the pants and got the hell out of there.

Guess where I'll go when Tommy gets back from this trip? Back to the original place where I have to turn left (dammit) but at least the business is above board, you can charge stuff, and they have more than one worker so they don't close down whenever they feel like it. Except on Saturday....oh well.

Okay, so I watch American Idol. Tommy hates that I watch it, but who cares? It's American Idol!! I know a lot of people just like to watch the beginning of it to see the really bad people get humiliated. Well, that's just mean. I like to watch the final 24 because that's when you get to see if the ones they pick can really sing, or if they just picked them to set them up for failure.

I watched the girls last night. I liked Paris. She was cute and talented. But young...oh, so young. Don't think she'll end up being able to hang. No mass appeal. Lisa...oh, Lisa. Young too, but oh so poised. Talented too. But I think they'll end up telling you there isn't enough emotion there in the end. Poor Lisa.

But tonight....well, tonight.....I I really think in the end this season is gonna be all about the guys. Sorry, Paris. Sorry Lisa. I think that's the way it's gonna be.

ACE!!!!! ACE!!!!! ACE!!!! What is there NOT to like about Ace? He's Constantine on steroids. I gots ta have me some Ace each week, I think. I loves me some Ace. Go check out some Ace for yourself. Trust me, if you didn't watch tonight he can sing too!

And Taylor. Man, Taylor you can really belt out a toon. Love to listen to Taylor...but look at him? Not so much. Maybe a little too old looking even for this seasoned pilot's wife.

And Sway....Sway....say it....Sway. It's just fun to say....Sway. Sway can sing...really high notes. But he's a little too girly for me. Fun to watch, but girly.

Bobby - go have another drink why don't ya?

Bucky....you need a throat lozenge, boy.

Elliott...you're good, I'll give you that. But I like to look at ACE....ACE....ACE!!!!!!! Sorry.

Gedeon.....where did you come from and how do we put you back? Pretentious, egotistical, egomaniacle twit. With a weird smile. Sorry, but I have to agree with Simon on that one. Creepy. Very creepy.

Kevin.....you're cute in a school boy sort of way. I think you need a few more years before you can be successful with the viewers. You look like you still need a babysitter.

Those are my impressions...nobody else really left one, good or bad.

So....what did you think (if you watched it)?

But this is WAY over the top in my book.

The painters are gone. The house is beautiful. Tommy has to put the stuff back up on the walls tomorrow. And here are some things I learned about painters and having your house painted in the past couple of days:

10. You WANT to leave the house when they are getting it ready to paint. This is tedious work and not much fun to watch.

9. While you're out, you might as well have breakfast, go to Best Buy, and go to lunch and maybe a movie and do some shopping (at least that's what we did).

8. Stop back by the house every once in a while.

7. You just might catch the crew playing pool on your nice pool table while they wait for the repairs to dry.

6. Once caught playing pool on the owners' table, painters will stay extra late to make up for having been caught.

5a. Speak a little Spanish to the crew...that way they'll know you know if you know what I mean...and they'll be a little more respectful when chatting amongst themselves about you - the owners.

5. If you have textured walls, you need to use the extra matted rollers (we've never done this, but will do it again given that they can take out an entire wall in the game room in less than five minutes with one of those bad boys).

4. Painting takes practice.

3. Once you practice enough, you don't need to screw around with that sticky blue painters' tape...you just push the brush up by the separation between the wall and the ceiling and paint a straight line.

2. It's ALWAYS a good idea to have someone ELSE do the painting.

1. If we ever build another house, we will tell the contractor "Don't worry about the paint. We'll take care of it"...because....they will charge you an upgrade fee for color but will still use the same shitty, chalky, $4/gallon paint so it's just not worth having them do it...call in a contractor and manage the work yourself.

So that's my top 10. As an aside, they're not paying me for this but I will direct you to the site of the place that did our job (try to look past the typo on the front page...they repaired all the friggin' cracks and buckles in our sheet rock and THAT'S what matters). They are VERY good....and we didn't pay a dime until we were satisfied. AND....they will come and fix stuff for up to three years from today. No questions asked.

Very nice.
Very happy.
Very pretty house.
Very satisfied.
Kinda buzzed (we drank wine to celebrate).

That is all.

The painters came yesterday. They were supposed to be done by last night. But they were an hour late due to icy roads, and they didn't leave until 7:45 last night....and they're not done.

So they're coming back today. To paint. All morning.

But...I've decided it's MUCH better to have them do it than us. These painters even patched all the cracks from where the house settled and fixed a couple other spots that were caused by owner error. And...we got to spend the whole day with Scytheboy...away from electronic devices. It was nice. Everyone should do that once in a while I think. A whole day.....away....from T.V. and the Internet. We even went to a movie together which is rare because Tommy works most weekends.

The other thing is...they moved all the furniture into the kitchen - in front of my computer so I couldn't look at anything last night. Tommy could though. He was on his computer while Scytheboy and I watched House and 24 in The Man Room.

The painters will move all the furniture back, sweep and vacuum the floors, and put the drapes back up. So by this afternoon all will be back to normal...and I will be out of excuses not to go to the gym. Damn.

Tommy found this quiz where you type in your name (or your blogger name) and it tells you what you are.

Of course, when he types in his blog name he gets this.

I'm convinced the man has a death wish. The only question is....should I kill him now or wait until I've had an adult beverage?

In 2002, California began requiring its seniors to pass exit tests in order to receive their high school diplomas. Since that time, there have been numerous lawsuits filed on behalf of students who did not pass the test, yet believe they deserve to receive a diploma anyway either because they are not proficient in English or feel they have not been given the education necessary to pass the test due to unqualified teachers or poor funding. Here's an excerpt from an article covering the suit:

Wednesday's lawsuit was filed on behalf of 10 seniors who have not yet passed the exit exam and their parents. State officials estimate that 80,000 of California's seniors have not yet passed the exit exam. Schools with low exit exam pass rates tend to be overcrowded and lack credentialed teachers, the suit says.

Here's my take on the whole exit exam thing. These students have known since as early as 2002 that they would have to pass the test to get a diploma. They have been given practice tests and have been offered additional help in preparing for it. Yet now...when graduation (or not) is imminent....they decide it's necessary to file a suit to get a free ride instead of working harder in order to pass the test.

This is a diploma from a high school in the United States...a country where English is the official language. While I know learning English can be a challenge...there are many immigrants that do and they learn it well enough to not only pass the exit tests in many states, but they score high on SAT and ACT tests and gain entrance to prestigious colleges and universities all over the country. In my opinion, to say they should be given a diploma even though have not mastered the language, or basic math, or whatever..is just a copout.

What....others should have to study and pass the test but they shouldn't just because they haven't bothered to learn English? If the diploma is that important to them, they would find a way. Others have and are achieving the American dream their parents wanted for them when they brought them to this country. While it's not their fault that English is their second language, these are American schools where all the classes are taught in English, and so it makes sense the tests would be in English as well.

If we offer the test in Spanish, say...we are setting a very complicated precedent. It would open the door for all non-English speakers to be given the same treatment...soon millions of education dollars will go toward teaching and creating tests in tens, if not hundreds of languages. Do we really want to go down that road?

Having said that, it is clear that many schools in impoverished areas do not have the teachers or funding necessary to help some overly challenged kids pass the test. This is why I am for school vouchers so those kids who actually want a decent education and care about the diploma and passing the exit test would have access to the support they need to accomplish this goal. There are clearly problems that need to be addressed in these areas.

However....it's also clear these kids have known they would have to pass the test for years. I would be interested to find out more background regarding what they've done to alert the school they feel they are not being served, and what steps the parents have taken to help their kids prepare for the test. It's my guess, unfortunately, that they've done little or nothing to work with the school until they filed the suit.

I think a kid should at least be able to pass a test that measures a minimum level of subject matter mastery before they are given a diploma. The bank is not going to give them "alternative" ways to balance their checkbook and an employer is not going to give them "alternative ways" to write their reports or whatever. A diploma is supposed to show a person is prepared to move onto the next steps in their lives; it is not just another piece of paper that is given as a handout for showing up the minimum required days of school and sitting in a seat.

UPDATE: In her comment, Paula raises one of the key issues here. Educators for so long have only had to show up and have not had to worry about providing any certain level of education as they are protected by their unions and the lack of a school voucher system which their lobbyists have successfully blocked in Congress. If we did it the way they do it in Denmark, I would guess standards everywhere would be much higher as teachers and schools would need to entice kids to enroll and stay since the money follows each child to the school of their choice.

You can read more about the Denmark system here.

Man, I wish we could make this fly in the U.S. but I know it's not possible given the politics of the situation.

Many others seem to be chiming in on this one, and I've put comments on the posts on their sites. But I thought I might as well tell you what I think about the whole deal.

First, I agree with Tommy. A guy should probably not shoot his friend during a hunting trip. Just not a good idea, ever, especially if you're in the public eye or represent the country in some capacity.

Having said that, I don't think this incident deserves the kind of attention it's receiving from the press and pundits. Look...the guys were on a hunting trip. Every hunter knows there is some risk involved in the activity. They had lunch around noon...and they all had a beer with lunch. Big deal. It was more than four hours later that the accident happened (or that "Cheney shot his friend" as some people like to say - whatever). The point is they were hunting, and Cheney was looking into the setting sun while he was shooting at a quail and his friend (who he didn't see standing there) go sprayed with some little round buckshot (not pellets as many are saying inaccurately).

Medical attention was given, Whittington was taken to the hospital, law enforcement was called, and questioning occurred. I'm sure everyone was pretty shaken up by the whole thing and alerting the Washington press probably wasn't the first thing on their minds. It should be noted that the Sheriff ruled this an accident and NO charges are being filed against Cheney. End of story. No wrong doing. Accident. Not planned. An accident. Not malicious. Not a felony. An accident. An accident that was NOT covered up with the police or anyone else.

Now....do I think having the ranch owner call a local paper to get the news out was a good strategy. Absolutely NOT. I have some experience with crisis communications (not on the political front but in business) and I can tell you this was a bad idea. And I think Scott McLellan would agree if he could actually tell us what he thinks...but it's his role to communicate what happened, not what he thinks.

Anyway....a better way probably would have been for the VP's press office to issue a short statement - after the Sheriff was done questioning everyone - with a brief quote from Cheney saying how horrible he felt about the whole thing...and a quote from the ranch owner, and probably one from the Sheriff doing the investigation - over AP. Then they should have made the VP's press people available for questions and provided the ranch owner's and Sheriff's contact info. for follow up questions.

But hindsight is 20/20. The point is Cheney did NOT cover this up....it was less than a day later that the ranch owner was talking to the press...as soon as they had clear status on Whittington's condition and his FAMILY HAD BEEN NOTIFIED.

I think this is more the Washington press having their egos bruised by not being the "first to know" and dem operatives and minority members of congress pouncing on even a glimmer of perceived scandal to use for their own political goals.

At least...that's what I think.

I am not a morning person. Let me just say that up front. So I am probably not in the best of moods when I take the boy to school in the morning. So things I see along the way might not exactly show themselves in the best possible light to me as I drive by.

But....I think you would agree....what I saw today was probably not the smartest move. There was a guy riding down the main street to the school, with one of those baby trailer type attachments. Now, I will say the baby was cute...all with his little baby bowl cut and baby PJ's and baby blanket and baby toys with him in the little trailer deal.

Having said that....it is windy today. Very windy. The little trailer deal was swerving all over the road as cars were swerving around the guy on the bike. Not good. SO not good.

I realize the guy probably needed to get his workout in and I of all people understand that. But I wonder if maybe he should have picked a better route....he could have gone down the bike trail close by so he could have kept his baby safe instead of in harm's way as the trailer swerved all over the road...or maybe if he'd just waited 30 minutes he could have avoided all the school traffic.

Just my opinion....poor baby.

about eating at McDonald's - or at least make you look at all your fries before you start. Yuck.

Some people are for the death penalty, and some are not. Personally, I think if someone kills a person they should be removed from society - permanently. Especially if that someone killed a child.

Today I noticed a story where a judge has ruled that California must change its mix of lethal injection drugs because they could constitute a "cruel and unusual" method of administering the death penalty.

I am left wondering....did this convicted person consider whether or not his rape and murder of a 17 year old girl was cruel and unusual when he committed his crime?

You know what I say? When someone is convicted and given the death penalty, they should be killed in the same way in which they made their victims suffer. Gunshot, beating, whatever. Maybe THEN people will reconsider when committing such awful crimes. I just think people should be given the same treatment they gave their victims.

Sorry if you think that's callous, but it's the way I feel.

The people at the mall were fleeing from the nerve gas, and all of a sudden:

Scytheboy: "Hmmpph."

Me: "What?"

Scytheboy: "All the hot girls are gettin' killed."

Alert - alert - childhood has left the building.

Tommy would be proud....

First, let me say that I am now officially out of painting hell. The small bathroom is as finished as it's going to get, and we have a contractor coming in to take care of all the major painting that needs to be done next week. And...the headache is gone.

Now that I've had time to sit down and catch up on the news, I caught the story on 12,000 government paid-for hotel rooms that FEMA will no longer be responsible for.

You all know that I am a Republican so I am for limited government and all that goes with it. I do believe that there are some things that should be seen to, such as school vouchers, school lunches, food stamps, etc. to help people get back on their feet once something happens that precludes their ability to take care of themselves and their families, or in the case of school vouchers to aid them in ensuring the best education possible for their kids.

Having said that....I do NOT believe the government should be responsible for supporting people 100% for the rest of their lives, or even for years - if they are physically able to work. What we've seen happen in New Orleans and other gulf states is horrible, to be sure. And I do believe those people needed to be helped for a few months until they could get their bearings and come up with short and long term plans for how they would find housing, get jobs, and take care of their families.

But come ON, people! It's been more than five months. The nation's unemployment rate is very low. There ARE jobs to be had. And FEMA is providing money that victims can use to fix their homes or rent new ones. What we are seeing here is the result of a highly flawed welfare system. It's my guess that at least some, if not the majority of, those families still living on the dole in hotels come from generations of welfare recipients which have never worked a day in their lives. Grandparents, parents, children and grandchildren...none of whom have ever had to do an honest day's work. And our flawed system has given these people absolutely no incentive to get off the dole - in fact, they are penalized when they do manage to find gainful employment to subsidize welfare and in some cases lose assistance when they find even just a low paying part-time job to help make ends meet and put food on the table.

We need to fix the system, that is not in question. But also....at some point if we don't start requiring able-bodied people to take personal responsibility for their own destiny by requiring them to work for the assistance they receive, or limit the time they are eligible to receive assistance, or at least make sure welfare recipients are seeking to better themselves by taking advantage of education assistance so they can move out the the system, the problems we see with hurricane victims looking for unlimited handouts will continue to get worse and worse until we eventually become a socialist welfare state where nobody is given any incentive to try and do better for themselves because it's too easy to just live off the dole.

(Deep breath).

There's my two cents.

Painting....H-E-L-L!! I did five - yes FIVE coats on the damn door and fixed the ceiling paint today (I have those damn textured walls where you can't ever get a straight line....but I'm trying).

And No....I am NOT anal or OCD or whatever just because I bought special teeny tiny little brushes to fix the ceiling (and then the wall from the bleed over from the ceiling) to make the unstraight lines as straight as possible.

Am not.

The nail lady chewed me out so I went and bought new gloves.

I took the tape off the door and trim....now blue paint has disappeared in some places and white paint has appeared where it's not supposed to be - in the blue paint area.

Guess what I'm doing tomorrow? Getting on that damn ladder again, teeny tiny hobby brush in hand, fixing the blue parts near the ceiling.

Then....I will get down on the floor and lean over in a near fetal position to fix the blue wall near the trim.

Again, not anal. Just want all the white stuff off the blue stuff, that's all.

And now....I think I have the beginning of one of those glorious three or four day headaches that like to hibernate in my head and come out at the most inconvenient time.

I HAVE to finish the blue stuff tomorrow...I promised Scytheboy he could have a friend over. A friend that likes to play pool. A lot.

Help. Please.

I didn't have a "real" post for today - per se- but I do have some random thoughts so here goes:

1. I've been painting.
2. The guest bathroom under the stairs.
3. A dark color.
4. With a light ceiling.
5. And accent trim and door.
6. I hate painting.
7. I REALLY hate painting.
8. I hate painting so much that Tommy called in a contractor, which will be painting all the ceilings and walls in the visible parts of our house later this month.
9. Why didn't we go ahead and have them paint the bathroom too?
10. Nobody knows, not even us. Maybe because we already bought the paint and I claimed I needed something to do.
11. Remind me to tell Tommy to remind me the next time I think painting a room's a good "something for me to do"....not to believe me.
12. But I digress.
13. Did I mention that I hate painting?
14. And all that goes with it?
15. The taping - HATE the taping - but ya gotta do it or you'll be sorry.
16. And for some reason the Scotch blue painter's tape is the only one that really works. What's up with that?
17. I might possibly hate sanding even more - but again, ya gotta do it. To avoid extra coats. On the trim and door.
18. Always remember to PAINT THE CEILING FIRST.
19. Nothing sucks more than painting a dark color on the walls, and a light color on the ceiling, which drips on the freshly painted dark walls.
20. Didn't do that this time...but HAVE done that before. BIG mistake.
21. Dark colors require more coats.
22. I hate more coats.
23. The ceiling's done, the walls are done, and first coat of paint on trim and door is done.
24. Did I mention I HATE to paint?
25. Why is it taking me days to do one tiny bathroom, whereas the contractor claims his experienced crew of five or 6 can do all visible parts of our house (22' ceilings, sheet rock repair and all) in merely a day?
26. Is that fair? I don't think so.
27. Why is that I painted the entire ceiling (twice - OK I confess, Tommy did it once too but I did it twice) without getting much paint on me?...
28. And the dark blue walls - twice - again, not much paint.
29. And by the end of today (long painting day 2) - I had huge splotches of the trim and door paint on my old yoga paints, old t-shirt, in my hair, and on my shoes?
30. What's up with that?
31. Must be because I HATE TO PAINT and it's the end of day 2.
32. I have to be done tomorrow.
33. Because I have a nail appointment.
34. My nail lady's gonna be mad at me.
35. Because I ran out of gloves at noon today.
36. Three pairs weren't enough.
37. I've had half a bottle of wine.
38. Because I had to paint today.
39. I'm saving the other half.
40. Because I have to paint again tomorrow.

That is all.

Apparently a school in Massachusetts suspended a first grader for sexual harassment. The article tells us that the six year old boy stuck his fingers inside the waistband of a student sitting in front of him and touched her.

Okay - first of all, clearly the kid has not been given any guidance from his parents regarding boundaries. Where did he learn that it's OK to put his fingers inside a girl's pants? Seriously...

The boy's mom claims he told her he touched her shirt, not her....but he didn't deny that his fingers were inside the girl's pants. The mom claims "he's too young to know any better." Whatever...he knew better. He was just seeing how far he could go, I'm sure. Kids aren't stupid.

And I wonder what else the boy has done in the past to warrant such punishment. It's my guess he's done other things and the school was left with no other choice but to remove him from the classroom once the girl's parents complained...but calling it sexual harassment might be a little too much of a charge for a first grader. I'm not saying that wasn't his intention, but that is a little young to be calling it that.

Judging from the boy's mom's reaction it's clear that she feels he does not need to take responsibility for his actions. Unfortunately, this view that it's always somebody else's fault or the kid "didn't know any better" and therefore should not be punished is one more example of the ever increasing erosion of good manners and adults refusing to take responsibility for their actions, and also their kids' actions.

Instead of using this event as a wake-up call to redirect her kid's behavior, the mom would rather write it off to "play" and blame the school for over reacting.

If I had a girl and she was in that class, I would definitely move her to another class or ensure she was never seated next to that boy, who apparently "doesn't know any better". Whatever.

Thoughts?

That stupid, negligent people should not be allowed to have kids.

I can officially call myself "Bootylicious". Beyonce said on Letterman tonight that to her, it means:

Beautiful, Bountiful, and Bouncy

Beautiful - Check (according to Tommy)

Bountiful - Check

Bouncy - Check

Yep, I'm definitely "Bootylicious". Of course, if you want the "official" definition in the dictionary, you can look here.

Personally, I like Beyonce's definition better. It's much more accurate - and cleaner.

Tommy and I went to Home Depot today to get some paint. You see, SugarMommy is coming to visit and I wanted to spruce up the place a bit before she gets here.

Anyway.....at the paint counter was probably one of THE most high-maintenance customers I've ever seen...anywhere. There she was...bottle blond, Botox forehead, fake boobs, high heels, designer clothes, expensive purse - well, you get the picture.

She had her husband with her and three or four Home Depot employees surrounding her and her pillow she had purchased at Foley's (in the Foley's bag to make sure everyone knew she had paid top dollar), trying to help her decide what paint to get that would match just perfectly with the pattern. I'm not kidding...she had a crowd around her. She kept calling one service person after another over to ask their opinion, demand more samples, and generally ensure the maximum level of assistance was procured for herself and her needs - above all other customers in the store.

At one point one service person said to another in hushed tones..."He's gonna kill her if she doesn't make a decision soon."

Seriously...it's one pillow with maybe a total of three or four colors in the pattern. It is NOT THAT DIFFICULT. I mean....Tommy and I made our paint decisions - by ourselves....fetching our own paint brochures to compare...in way less than 10 minutes.

Clearly, this woman is used to very high levels of service wherever she goes...from home to Foley's to The Galleria (I'm sure)....and even the paint counter at Home Depot.

Certain people just shouldn't be allowed in stores. Neither indecisiveness nor narcissism are attractive traits...and they are doubly ugly when combined in one person.

I'm sure all the paint department personnel on that shift had to go home and drink after dealing with that woman.

Okay, so as usual I'm having a hard time coming up with something to post about on this beautiful, sunny February day in Dallas. So I was scanning the headlines and I ran across this article. I know...it's on the Fox site....sorry for those of you that don't like to go to that page but the story did catch my eye.

Apparently there are some businesses that have been complaining to sites like Yahoo and AOL that their emails are not making it through to their customer base. And some customers have complained that their needed emails have been taken out by spam filters. So....Yahoo, AOL and probably others are going to offer a program where in exchange for paying a fee, e-mail senders will be guaranteed their messages won't be filtered and will bear a seal alerting recipients they're legitimate.

Of course, we've all missed emails from companies that we do business with and that we probably need to see...but that's what the "Bulk Mail" or "Junk Mail" folders are for. We don't lose the emails, we simply delay looking at them until it's convenient. This way WE can control when we sort through what we do and don't want to read. So there are workarounds for those of us who like and use spam filters.

Look, we all know these sites are in the business of making money, and while they would like their customers to think their included spam filters will protect them from obnoxious, unsolicited ads.....this program (in my opinion) will negate the filters. Now, spammers will look at the additional fee as a normal cost of doing business.

The article didn't say if there are review measures in place that would disallow companies known for sending out pure spam (re-finance solicitations, Viagra ads, etc.). It only says that companies can pay for their emails not to be deleted by the spam filter. Here's an excerpt:

In exchange for a payment and a pledge to contact only people who have agreed to receive their messages, the companies would be ensured their e-mails aren't diverted to spam folders or have images or Web addresses filtered out.

The companies also would receive reports showing how many e-mails were received successfully - great, not only can they bypass the spam filter, they can ensure they sent the spam to a legitimate address and then sell that address to other spammers.

Wonderful. Sounds like this program is tailor-made to aid spammers, not deter them.

So the end result of this program will be, I fear, that now we will all start seeing many emails in our Inbox claiming to be legit that aren't, and our email addresses will be sold and re-sold at an ever-increasing rate through the spam community.

Happy Monday.

Okay, only a couple of you know my real name (like family and a couple close blogger friends) so I guess I can tell this story. Every time I think about it I laugh my ass off...to the point of tears.

Anyway....my first job at a hi-tech company was in Utah (won't tell you the name of the company...sorry). Scytheboy was about 2 and Tommy was deployed somewhere - probably in Saudi or an exercise or school somewhere.

But I digress. Anyway....it was always good to get out of the office for lunch. On one particular day.....I had just moved over from an administrative position to a pure marketing role, and some of my co-workers were going to lunch. They wanted to go to this Mexican place that I'd been to before, but the food had not agreed with me. But it was a chance to get out of the office, so what the hell? It was probably going to be my main meal of the day since I had a tendency to pick up Scytheboy, feed him, play with him, give him a bath and put him to bed...eat very little....and then get right back on the computer to continue working.

Anyway...I went with them to the place so I would at least eat something substantial that day (can I just mention that I looked HOT back then....business dress suits size 6 with heels...oh yeah, those were the days).

So....we went to eat (don't worry, the gastric moment is coming). We drive back to the office, and we're in MG's cube with BB chatting a little before we get back to work...and....I feel it....the dreaded....silent....DEALDY ONE!!!!! It silently escapes my outer gastric region...throgh my hose....out the bottom of the skirt.

I quickly excuse myself and walk back to my cube which is exactly two cubes down and across the narrow cube hallway. Then....I hear it....

MG: "Did you just fart?"

BB: "No, I didn't fart. Oh, my GOD! Did you do that?!"

Me: Laughing silently, holding it in with such fervor that my face is bright red and tears are streaming down my face...but alas....some giggles escape.

MB: "Wait a minute..."

There I am...head in hands, tears streaming down my face, trying to laugh silently, kleenex in hand, hose clad legs crossed....I turn around...and....there they are....BB and MG standing in the door of my cube.

MG (hands on hips, face red, small grin on his face): "It was you, wasn't it?"

BB (giggling jovially): "It WAS you, wasn't it? Ha...ha ha ha ha...."

I have never been so embarrassed in my life.

And there's your funny gastric moment....courtesy of me.

Cheers.

According to an article pulled from the AP, Army Chaplains have started training GIs how not to marry a jerk.

First, I can't say I agree with the name of the program. I know they're trying to make it fun, but still.....THEY can be jerks too. How about..."How not to be a jerk."

Having said that....I do think a program like this, especially in times like this is a good idea. I know from personal experience that many deployments, varying in length to in excess of a whole year or more, can be stressful on a marriage. You definitely have to be the right type of person to thrive in a relationship where your better half could be called at a moment's notice to a war zone or for training for an extended period of time. People with dependant natures and people who are selfish of their own needs over the needs of the country do not do well in military marriages.

I did see some women like that while we were in the F16 community, and nine times out of 10 when a long deployment came they ran home to mommy so their parents could help them with the kids and provide emotional support. These same women, when a state-side training deployment happened....actually went to the city where the deployment was and often times brought their kids along and stayed in the hotel with their spouses. Bad idea...VERY bad idea. Flying jets is intense, and passing the academic courses (like Squadron Officers School for example) was necessary to progress in one's career...having the family distracting the pilot from the goal of passing the course or from flying the training exercise was a bad deal for the pilot and the family...the family felt neglected because the pilot was focused on the mission at hand, and the pilot tended not to do as well in classes or on training missions due to lack of sleep and the distractions associated with having the wife and young children in the room.

The military spouse has to be independent, willing to take on all the spouse's responsibilities at home while they are away, and must be able to handle crisis situations with the kids and the house and make firm decisions quickly to ensure the home life remains stable for the kids and worry-free for the spouse that is deployed.

I'm sure they're covering all this in the course which I think is a VERY good thing. The lure of having something to come home to can be strong...but it has to be the right kind of "something" to come home to. I can remember during Desert Storm I a lot of people were deployed that were under the mistaken impression that they were in a "safe" career field that would never see the front. Um....wrong. Anybody in uniform should expect to be deployed to a war zone at any time for any reason. Those that joined up simply to take advantage of the GI bill without having to actually perform a function in a war zone were either stupid or living in a dream world. Unfortunately, before the war these same people married spouses who were also led to believe their husband or wife would never be deployed to support a war.

Unfortunately, many who live under this impression cannot handle it when the spouse is deployed. I can clearly remember talk in line at the base Credit Union of women who had cleaned out their bank accounts, left the base, and filed divorce papers while their husbands were deployed to Iraq because "they didn't sign up for this".

For me, when you marry a member of the military, you ALWAYS "sign up for this". Those that think otherwise should not marry into the life.

In short...from my experience and what I've seen happen to military marriages...the program is a VERY good idea....but they could have done a better job with the name.

Well, here we go again. I had the news on while doing laundry, and one of the "News Alerts" caught my attention. Apparently, a 9 year old shot another 11 year old this morning on a school bus in Compton, CA.

Nine. That's what....third grade? What could possibly be going on in the life of a third grader that would require shooting a classmate on the bus?

Details aren't out yet, but my guess is it's another case of a kid showing off a gun to his friend and this resulted in an accidental shooting.

I've said before that I think people should be allowed to own guns...not machine guns or anything, but hunting rifles and maybe a revolver for protection. I think I might have to ammend that to say.....only intelligent, law-abiding non-neglectful people should be allowed to own guns. Maybe they could install tracking devices on guns so police could check to make sure they weren't left laying around the house for kids to pick them up, play with them, and take them to school for show and tell? Oh, I forgot. "Invasion of Privacy" PC folks would nix that plan. They wouldn't want children's safety to get in the way of their civil liberties, now would they? Of course not.

In any case, no matter what happens I really don't think we'll see the end of these stories until the parents are held accountable - and in a BIG way. I'm talking major fines AND jail time and CPS investigations...I'm for whatever it takes to keep the kids and their friends safe from random guns laying around the house.

UPDATE: Apparently, I was correct in assuming this was an accidental shooting. You can read the short article here.

Buy as many salad dressings as it takes (or make as many as you have to) in order to find one that he likes. Scytheboy will eat any type of green we put his new favorite dressing on...and he eats the whole salad first before he touches anything else.

In case you're wondering...his new favorite is Newman's Own Light Italian.

Trust me...it works.

I don't know about you...but to me, it seems that Cindy Sheehan could do with a bit of a makeover.

I mean, if she did something with her hair and got a good support bra and actually wore a little makeup and invested in some clothes that fit (even if I wouldn't necessarily agree with what's written on the clothes).....I think she might get a bit more media coverage which is apparently what she's looking for.

Maybe she can get some of those groups that seem to be funding all her travel and escapades to pony up a stylist or something.

I'm just sayin'......

I usually try to stay as far away from politics as I can, as the subject is volatile and there are a lot of angry people out there.

But I will say this about what I saw last night during The State of the Union speech. I could not believe that certain people chose last night to so freely show their true colors with regard to how they feel about obstructing any and all reform to Social Security. I mean....I always figured that any time they were able to stop reforms, cuts, or new programs proposed by the other side they were pleased with themselves...this is how politics has always been.

However....to gleefully stand up, laugh, and applaud themselves for letting Social Security languish in an antiquated system that will not be able to accommodate the many Baby Boomers whose retirement is just around the corner is truly beyond me.

When the Social Security system does go bankrupt....I wonder how those people will feel when their gleeful cheering is replayed in front of the millions of people that will be negatively effected by their lazy inaction.

All I can say is...if you don't agree with the Republican plan, then at least bother to try and come up with an alternative instead of just doing nothing and then cheering about it.

If you're only going to be on level one, not breaking a sweat, and refuse to actually use the arm things...GET OFF THE DAMN MACHINE and let someone use it who actually like, you know, USES it.