I traded emails today with my dad, who thinks I should be working given that I do have a particular skill set and can actually write. I've talked about why I don't work in a previous post.

The exchange today got me thinking again about why I don't work and what it was like when I did work. There are various reasons why I don't work, foremost among them being transportation and activity issues with The Boy.

Another BIG reason why I don't work is because when I do work - I GO ALL IN. By all in, I mean getting up at 5:30, being to work by 7:30, working all day long (lunch at my desk), driving home to eat dinner...and then immediately after dinner getting straight back to work. Tommy would often ask me why I even bothered coming home for dinner if all I was going to do was work.

In addition, many, many, many planned family trips were canceled because of my work. Whether it be pulling together kit components and videos for four simultaneous new product launches or helping to prepare the quarterly financial news release....in my world family time took a back seat to work...always...no exceptions. And I traveled for work as well, with trade shows and media tours with the CEO. The CEO even called me at home when I was taking a couple of days off with my sister as she was down for a visit..some PR crisis or another, I can't remember.

When I worked, I was always the busiest person..and always the person they would give extra work to because they knew I would get it done. I always envied (okay, hated) those people that actually took their vacations - weeks at a time - while I remained behind and picked up the slack. At my last job, I was the ONLY one in the company who knew anything about public relations, so I managed three agencies (one of them in London), wrote most of the news releases, and approved all third party PR including our company name. It was a heavy burden that I resented at times...and I guess I can understand if Tommy did too.

However, I can't say that the company was totally to blame. I liked to have control over my work, and that meant that I just took care of what needed to be taken care of rather than considering help from elsewhere. If it got to be too much even for me, I would sit down with the CEO and we would work out priorities...he was a really good CEO. Unfortunately, my direct boss was more interested in taking long lunches, skipping out on scheduled press interviews, and refusing to provide needed approvals, if I'm being honest.

Yes...I could have taken those family trips and been gone for extended periods...but the work would have suffered, and I was all about leaving no loose ends and doing the best possible job. Even after the company was sold and I could have slacked off during those last few weeks, I still prepared an upcoming press release grid and wrote four press releases for the new company's PR team. And the CEO thanked me for being "super-professional" about the whole thing.

I guess what I'm saying is if you're an "all-in" person when it comes to work, then I know from personal experience that all other areas of your life will suffer. I can remember falling asleep at 7:30 at night while playing Monopoly with The Boy.

So life is all about priorities. And after that last time I got laid off, Tommy and I took a good hard look at our finances and talked about our priorities. During these critical years with The Boy, we both decided that he had to be the priority. And I must say it was definitely the right decision...for us (me being the "all in at work" type of person that I am).

So what if I don't shop at Nieman's or even Dillard's (very often)? So what if I don't drive a Mercedes? So what if I don't wear $300 shoes? I get to travel quite a bit, spend lots of time with The Boy during this very critical time, pay close attention to my health, and spend time with Tommy when he is home.

Yes...for us...me being "all in" at home is definitely better than me being "all in" at work.

So...when you work, are you "all in" or are you able to leave it at the office and take full advantage of your time away from your desk?

The following conversation took place after school today.

Me: "Come and take these margaritas up to the fridge in the bar."

The Boy: "Are we having a party or something?"

Me: "No, Buffi's coming into town and she might stop by for a drink."

The Boy: "But why do we need two gallons of margaritas?"

Me: "Didn't you hear me? Buffi might come by for a drink."

Enough said. Right?

As I was ordering a bundled XBox 360 Premium system online today (yes, you can find them at Walmart.com and other reputable online entities now - not just eBay) I began to list in my head all the gadgets we've acquired in the past few years. With this latest purchase, I really do think we have more stuff than any family of three really needs. Let's review:

-One 48" projection big screen T.V. - Check
-One primitive VCR - Check
-One primitive CD player - Check
-Three MP3 players - Check
-Two digital cameras - Check
-Three cell phones - Check
-One PS2 game system with three controllers - Check
-One wide screen 57" HD TV wired with latest surround sound technology and components - Check
-One HD DVD player - Check
-Two XBox game consoles with three wireless controllers and two wired controllers - Check
-One XBox live membership and headset - Check
-Various XBox games and PS2 games - Check
-Three 19" flat screen monitors - Check
-Three computer towers/two containing R/W DVDs - Check
-One laptop computer w/DVD - Check
-One old TiVo box (no subscription but we can use it to pause live T.V.) - Check
-Two cable boxes with DVRs containing dual tuners - Check
-One cable box for The Boy to watch TV through his computer and one cable box for our room - Check
-Two 27" TVs
-House wired with fiber optics - Check
-Smokin' fast Internet access (36 Mbps) - Check
-One router which allows wireless Internet access from all of our computers - Check
-3 Electric guitars and two amps - Check
-Two guitar effects pedals for the electric guitars (Happy Birthday, Tommy!) - Check
-Nintendo Game Cube (Limited Edition Platinum) - Check (oh wait, he sold that) - Uncheck

-Fully loaded XBox 360 Premium console with two wireless controllers and extra memory - Coming Soon

Think we have enough, or do we need more? Wait...don't answer that....Tommy might decide there's some gadget he doesn't have yet...

I've written here before about different things service people do that annoy me. In case you forgot, here's a partial list to remind you:

1. When they talk on the phone with a friend while ringing me up, not even looking me in the eye once.
2. When they run away from me down the aisle when they can tell I'm approaching them with a question.
3. When they congregate in a group, backs to customers, and chat amongst themselves.
4. When they are on the phone and continue their conversation...in their own good time....until they're finished - while you're waiting to pay for gas AFTER you've pumped it. In this case, they truly hold you hostage unless you just want to leave without paying and risk arrest.
5. Waitresses that take forever to bring the check....yes I have been tempted on more than one occasion to walk out on a check...but I haven't...because I waited tables once and I know any number of things can cause such a delay.
6. Any service person who stalks me relentlessly until I am forced to leave the store just to have some peace.

Anyway, I was thinking about the question of service people over the past few days and how I always like to complain about them but rarely acknowledge there are some very good service people out there.

Take the pool service manager, for instance. She went WAY out of her way to make up for the lag in resolving our pool filter issues. She did such a good job that I emailed her a thank you note so she could pass it along to her boss if she wanted to. One good turn deserves another.

Or the dry cleaner I now go to where they happily let me sit in my car while they process my clothes for cleaning or bring me my fresh clean clothes, placing them oh so carefully on the hanger over my back door.

Or the garage repair guy who got to my house in less than 40 minutes yesterday, swept the garage under the door, replaced our broken spring with a brand new high-quality one and changed out all the wheels in the garage door track. He even put in a new light bulb for me. He was very nice and courteous, and he didn't even charge me an emergency service fee. I shall send a thank you note to Overhead Door in the next couple days.

Or the air conditioner place that helps me out when our unit is on the fritz...they show up the day I call and are honest and friendly as they help us try and get one more year out of our system before we have to replace it.

So what I'm saying is there ARE a lot of really good service people out there. And I try and thank them in ways that will help them along at their jobs. So the question is...when is the last time YOU thanked a service person for a job well done? I know, we shouldn't have to thank them for competently doing their jobs. But it is so rare that people in the service industry actually ARE competent at their jobs these days I feel we must encourage them however we can when we are satisfied with the results. Don't you?

Before, when I worked, my answer to this question would have been a resounding "no." However, now that I don't work and every penny counts, I find myself jumping through all the necessary hoops to redeem maximum rebate dollars.

Example...we recently bought TurboTax and McAfee Internet Security software. Best Buy was running rebates on the McAfee stuff alone, plus a bundled rebate with the tax software proof of purchase. Both rebates together equal the amount spent on the McAfee software...in essence making the security stuff free if I bothered to send them both in.
Hey, $70 is nothing to sneeze at.

True, rebates are a pain...you must copy this receipt, cut out that UPC, tear off the other inside flap proof of purchase...but how long does it really take? Maybe five minutes of your time plus a postage stamp to send most of these things in. And Best Buy has some in-store rebates now you can go online and fill out while you're doing other stuff and this takes even less time.

Business Week published an article on rebates, rebate redemption rates, and consumer complaints related to rebates. Go read it if you want.

Of course, with any program there will always be some people out there with complaints that want their voices heard. On the retailer side, they run these things hoping and praying there aren't a lot of people out there like me that bother to take the time to actually read the rules and follow them and bother to mail in the stuff to get the cash. They run the things hoping to get on the good side of your money-saving mentality while praying you will not bother to actually redeem the offer.

So there's my take on it. The question is...do you bother to take advantage of these special offers, or are you like many and forget about them and eventually toss them in the trash?

So if you have a minute go take this test. Shouldn't take long at all.

'Kay? 'Kay.

In 2002, California began requiring its seniors to pass exit tests in order to receive their high school diplomas. Since that time, there have been numerous lawsuits filed on behalf of students who did not pass the test, yet believe they deserve to receive a diploma anyway either because they are not proficient in English or feel they have not been given the education necessary to pass the test due to unqualified teachers or poor funding. Here's an excerpt from an article covering the suit:

Wednesday's lawsuit was filed on behalf of 10 seniors who have not yet passed the exit exam and their parents. State officials estimate that 80,000 of California's seniors have not yet passed the exit exam. Schools with low exit exam pass rates tend to be overcrowded and lack credentialed teachers, the suit says.

Here's my take on the whole exit exam thing. These students have known since as early as 2002 that they would have to pass the test to get a diploma. They have been given practice tests and have been offered additional help in preparing for it. Yet now...when graduation (or not) is imminent....they decide it's necessary to file a suit to get a free ride instead of working harder in order to pass the test.

This is a diploma from a high school in the United States...a country where English is the official language. While I know learning English can be a challenge...there are many immigrants that do and they learn it well enough to not only pass the exit tests in many states, but they score high on SAT and ACT tests and gain entrance to prestigious colleges and universities all over the country. In my opinion, to say they should be given a diploma even though have not mastered the language, or basic math, or whatever..is just a copout.

What....others should have to study and pass the test but they shouldn't just because they haven't bothered to learn English? If the diploma is that important to them, they would find a way. Others have and are achieving the American dream their parents wanted for them when they brought them to this country. While it's not their fault that English is their second language, these are American schools where all the classes are taught in English, and so it makes sense the tests would be in English as well.

If we offer the test in Spanish, say...we are setting a very complicated precedent. It would open the door for all non-English speakers to be given the same treatment...soon millions of education dollars will go toward teaching and creating tests in tens, if not hundreds of languages. Do we really want to go down that road?

Having said that, it is clear that many schools in impoverished areas do not have the teachers or funding necessary to help some overly challenged kids pass the test. This is why I am for school vouchers so those kids who actually want a decent education and care about the diploma and passing the exit test would have access to the support they need to accomplish this goal. There are clearly problems that need to be addressed in these areas.

However....it's also clear these kids have known they would have to pass the test for years. I would be interested to find out more background regarding what they've done to alert the school they feel they are not being served, and what steps the parents have taken to help their kids prepare for the test. It's my guess, unfortunately, that they've done little or nothing to work with the school until they filed the suit.

I think a kid should at least be able to pass a test that measures a minimum level of subject matter mastery before they are given a diploma. The bank is not going to give them "alternative" ways to balance their checkbook and an employer is not going to give them "alternative ways" to write their reports or whatever. A diploma is supposed to show a person is prepared to move onto the next steps in their lives; it is not just another piece of paper that is given as a handout for showing up the minimum required days of school and sitting in a seat.

UPDATE: In her comment, Paula raises one of the key issues here. Educators for so long have only had to show up and have not had to worry about providing any certain level of education as they are protected by their unions and the lack of a school voucher system which their lobbyists have successfully blocked in Congress. If we did it the way they do it in Denmark, I would guess standards everywhere would be much higher as teachers and schools would need to entice kids to enroll and stay since the money follows each child to the school of their choice.

You can read more about the Denmark system here.

Man, I wish we could make this fly in the U.S. but I know it's not possible given the politics of the situation.

Buy as many salad dressings as it takes (or make as many as you have to) in order to find one that he likes. Scytheboy will eat any type of green we put his new favorite dressing on...and he eats the whole salad first before he touches anything else.

In case you're wondering...his new favorite is Newman's Own Light Italian.

Trust me...it works.

I don't think so. But apparently many parents in the Dallas ISD area do. I was watching the local news this morning while I was waiting for Scytheboy to get ready to go, and there was a quick segment about schools in the Dallas ISD moving kids in the 6th grade to middle school. Apparently, many parents went to the Board meeting last night and were up in arms over the whole thing. One parent was on camera saying, "Kids are not ready for such a highly charged emotional environment at this age. I mean...the people that are supposed to care the most about our children are stealing their childhood." Or...something like that. But it's pretty close, trust me.

Wait...what? "Stealing their childhoods"? They're 11 and 12 for God's sake! I have never heard of 6th graders NOT being in middle school. I mean...I was. I know some areas do junior high instead of middle school and that's 7th and 8th grade...but the areas that have middle school usually start in 6th grade don't they? Or...maybe I'm wrong.

What I'm trying to say is....I have a strong suspicion that it's not the kids that aren't ready for middle school....it's the parents. These are probably the same parents that held their kids back a year before starting them in kindergarten because they "weren't ready". Whatever. They were ready. But the parents weren't. I will admit that in a few extreme cases where the kids have been highly sheltered they might not be quite ready for kindergarten, but I believe that is the fault of the parents for not getting them ready more than anything else. Just my opinion...I'm not a psychologist or anything. I'm just a parent who through the years has seen some really good parenting and also some really bad parenting on the part of my son's friends' parents.

I can say from personal experience that our son was MORE than ready for middle school. There's more freedom of choice, less coddling, and more expected of them in the way of academics, physical education and how they behave toward others and their teachers. I think sending them to middle school is a GOOD thing. Our son was miserable in elementary school, but he is thriving in middle school....in the 6th grade.

They are more than ready, my friends. More than ready. Not ready? Ridiculous.

So anyway, you're probably sick of hearing about me being sick. But I am still sick, this time with something new. While we were visiting up in Wisconsin, the majority of my family was getting over a nasty cold. In addition, many, many, many, many of our fellow travelers at airports and on planes were hacking up a lung and sneezing and few were making any effort at all to cover their mouths and/or noses to protect those around them. The guy sitting behind us on our second to last flight coughed constantly.

So who knows why I have a cold, but I do. As I am unable to go to the gym or do anything else really except sit around and lament/whine about being sick to Tommy (who has now sequestered himself in his man room upstairs), I thought it would be interesting to pose the question - What's your cold medication mix?

Now....when I am really really sick with a cold or flu and am at the point that I cannot sit up straight without feeling faint and all I want to do is sleep, I take this. I take the citrus version because it goes down easier...but don't believe the marketing. It WILL make you drowsy and a little fuzzy around the edges which makes it hard to read or watch TV while you're laying around moaning.

But when I'm a little more ambulatory, like with this cold (but don't misunderstand me...I can't walk up the stairs without feeling winded and a little dizzy so I AM sick) I like to take a certain mix of meds that knocks out most of the symptoms. Sure, I'm a little dizzy and my ears ring a little but this works for me:

+ +

So...what works for you? I'm curious.

So said Peaches on the topic of "Questions"
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I was thinking about this subject today as I was getting ready to leave my hairdresser's pleasant little cube. She works for herself and rents space at one of those one-stop salon boutique buildings where all the folks have their own little place.

As a rule of thumb, if it's a service person I go to on a regular basis and they do a good job...I try to give them at least twice the normal tip when Christmas time comes around. I realize these people live off their tips to a large degree and I try to do what I can to show them how much I appreciate their good work.

Emily Post says you should consider:

- the quality and frequency of the service
- your relationship with the service provider
- where you live (amounts are usually higher in large cities)
- the frequency of the service or how long you have worked together
- your budget
- regional customs
- the type of establishment: deluxe vs. moderate

I think all this sounds reasonable. I tip the hairdresser because she gives good service AND because she's a really cool person. Also my nail lady...she has four kids to buy for on Christmas AND in my opinion does the best nails in town. So of course she gets a good holiday tip.

But...the garbage man? The mail delivery guy? I don't think so. Those guys make good livings.

And when I get that "holiday" card - with the newspaper delivery person's home address conveniently placed right where I can see it...I almost feel like they're trying to strong-arm me into giving them a tip or else...or else what? I don't know...or else they'll throw my paper in the bushes? I don't have a direct relationship with the paper guy or gal or whatever....I don't even know who they are.

As for the teachers....well this year my son has seven of them. All of whom he only sees an hour a day. I don't think we'll be doing teacher gifts now that he's in middle school....but he used to give his teacher and his gifted teacher chocolates at Christmas.

So I suppose now you all think I'm a terrible person for not tipping the garbage man, mail delivery guy or paper boy(girl).

The question is....do you tip your service people a little extra on the holidays? Where do YOU draw the line?

When you start moving stuff around the cracker shelf and notice the expiration date on the Giant Goldfish box is July, 2003. Needless to say, the pantry got a thorough once-over today. Many items were found to be less than palatable and found their way into the trash can.

That is all.

At least that's what the quiz says about me. H/T to Paula for this one.

You're a scientific intellectual.


What Sort of Intellectual Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

So said Peaches on the topic of "Questions"
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Well I dragged Scytheboy out for shopping today as promised. I call it Christmas shopping...you can call it Holiday shopping...it's my blog so I get to call it what I want. You don't have to read it if you don't like it.

Anyway....The stops at Best Buy, Toys r Us and a department store (along with a few items I got online when we got back) helped me achieve the majority of my shopping for the season. I even got my gifts for all the Wisconsin relatives (those I'm buying for) wrapped and in the mail.

As soon as the online stuff gets here early next week, I can ship stuff out to Tommy's family in West Texas. Then, when Tommy tells me what he wants for Christmas (materially - get your mind out of the gutter) and I get that bought during his next trip - I should be about 98% done with my shopping. Stocking stuffers will be all that remain and I can get those at the grocery store.

I hate to shop...I hate it vehemently. So words cannot describe how relieved I am to be almost done with the shopping part and half way done with the shipping part. Shopping and shipping...shopping and shipping....the two things I hate most about the holidays.

So....how are you doing on your Christmas (or Holiday if you prefer) shopping? Started yet?

Question: Do you suffer from a condition called "Bacon Frustration"?

Definition: Bacon frustration is the state one reaches when, after trying to be health conscious and trying different, more healthy varieties of the stuff (such as center cut and low sodium and turkey, etc.), all a person really craves is a good, thick, crispy normal slice of bacon.

I was shopping today, examining the many varieties of bacon....when I suddenly realized that I do, in fact, suffer from "Bacon Frustration". So I bought my good-old black label thick cut normal Hormel bacon and I will greedily eat it on Thanksgiving morning, thank you very much!

No more bacon frustration for me. How about you?

I had company for lunch and we ate a big meal, complete with my favorite home made chocolate cake. As a result, I'm still kinda full from lunch but I do have a little room left and it is, after all.....time for dinner.

So the question is...would it be wrong to just have chocolate cake for dinner? I'm thinking not, but I would like some more objective opinions...please?

The time of year where the leaves fall, my friend. The leaves fall. A lot. In the pool. And you have to use the net through the water to take them out. Did you know the net gets a helluva lot heavier when you pull it through the water? Eventually your shoulders start to ache and you get carpel tunnel in your forearms from angling the net this way and that trying to get the maximum number of leaves per pull.

Having said that, this is the only time of year that I absolutely hate having a pool. That is all.

When you're invited to an open house and you don't really know anybody that's going to be there, you (at least I) go through an internal q&a process trying to come up with a good reason not to go. After all, I'm not very good at small talk and especially this week I really didn't want to see anyone or speak to anyone at all. Having said that, this was my internal q&a relating to how I could possibly get out of going to the open house:

1. Would it be rude to decline just because I don't feel like meeting new people?
Probably. Damn.

2. Could I get away with saying I have to stay home and make sure our son does his homework?
Probably not. Everyone knows he's a straight A student and works better when left alone. Crap.

3. Could I call them and say I really wouldn't be great company given what happened this week with our dog?
Again - no. They would probably encourage you to come and tell you it will help take your mind off things. Again - crap.

4. Could I call just before the open house is about over and claim I got really lost trying to get there?
No. They're nice people and would give me proper directions from made-up lost location and then I'd REALLY be lost, trying to get to the location I made up so I could follow new directions and could give details if questioned. That won't work either.

5. Can I come up with any valid reason not to go, other than I just don't want to?
No, that would be rude. Get up off your ass, get dressed, put the wine in the bag and go.

Needless to say, I went. A friend of my sister's recently moved to the area and she invited me to her open house. It's just rude not to go if you can when an invitation like this is extended. So I made the effort and I went, even though I SO did not feel like being around anyone.

But I have to say I'm really glad I went. She's a nice girl, and I got to finally meet her husband who is also very nice and they have a one year old who is very cute. There was only one problem....they have a dog the same breed as ours was. So that was a little tough. Okay, it was a lot tough. But I took a tour of their lovely new house, met a few new people, actually made some mild attempt at small talk, and about an hour later I left. It's almost an hour back to our house so I did have a valid excuse that I needed to get home before dark and figure out something to feed the boy.

Note: The "boy" will probably make himself something for dinner because he's not so much a boy anymore as he is a small adult. But that's beside the point.

As a side note, I'd like to say thank you to everyone who dropped by Michele's, Tommy's and here to leave a note of condolence for the loss of our dog. He was really Tommy's dog, but he was the best dog I have ever known and he will be a sorely missed member of our family.

I was scanning the news yesterday evening because to be honest I am neither as motivated nor creative as the people who are now busily working on their novels and posting first chapters like Catherine.

Anyway, I noticed it looks like the Post Office will more than likely be successful at raising rates once again just in time for Christmas (oops, sorry....just in time for "the holiday you choose to celebrate during the winter months").

I don't know about you, but I rarely send anything via U.S. mail anymore...unless it's a package or something that I have to physically take in to get mailed. It's just so easy now to have your bank pay all your bills...for free, no postage in some cases because they do it electronically. Free....and much safer for the most part. No pesky mail box thieves trying to steal your identity and all that. Also email, sadly, has become my first choice in the way of conversing with my friends and family. SO much quicker...and cheaper. However, I do try and be a good mom and have Scytheboy send hand-written thank you notes for gifts. Sort of the "do as I say, not as I do" thing.

So...how have you handled all the postage rate hikes? Have you gone electronic with your bill paying and correspondence or are you a hands-on write your return address and lick and stick your own stamp type?

I've posted before on all the road construction that's going on around where we live. One of the necessary evils of said construction is that the workers need to block off and/or move lanes from time to time so they can do the work required to widen the roads. This action by the road crews unfortunately brings out really, really bad behavior by certain people who feel themselves more important than all others on the road.

You know the ones I'm talking about....the people who weave out of traffic, race to the front of the line, and then cut in so they can make it home or to their current destination faster. Because, in their mind, what they have to do is WAY more important than what anyone else has to do, and they as a person are WAY more important than anyone else, and so therefore they should be let into line so they can quickly move toward work or home, or wherever...before anyone else.

As a side note, it goes without saying that the cutter-inners are always in expensive cars and talking on a cell phone.

I have never, ever done this (intentionally, that is). I think it's rude, inconsiderate, and sometimes downright dangerous. The road crews around here are pretty good about giving fair warning to drivers about upcoming lane manipulations, and considering the fact that most of these "cutter-inners" are in SUVs and have a very, very good view of what's coming up there really is no excuse for them not to make an early attempt to move over so as not to impede the flow of traffic.

But NOooooo......they race as fast as they can to the exact point that their lane ends and then aggressively cut off the person at the front of the line, causing a chain reaction of brakes, horns and cussing that ensures all others patiently waiting their turn to proceed are set back even longer in their endeavor to get to where they're going. But do these cutter-inners care? No, because invariably people will slam on their brakes and let them in instead of moving forward just enough so as to ensure the cutter-inner does NOT get what they want.

Do you know why the cutter-inners do it? Because it works...most people just don't think it's worth fighting over just to make sure they're ahead of one more car or to make sure the cutter-inner has to wait like the rest of us...no, they go ahead and let them in. The cutter-inners are scavengers preying on the safe driving skills of those that willingly let them in and reward them for their bad behavior.

I've had it with the cutter-inners. I never, ever let them in. Ever. They should not be rewarded for trying to beat the system, they should be condemned and punished. If you see a cutter-inner trying to cut in front of you, do not reward them. Make them wait. Eventually if enough of us do this, they will stop trying. But unfortunately there are way too many good patient people for the cutter-inners to take advantage of so this evil behavior will continue as long as road crews block off lanes for construction.

So...do you let the cutter-inners in?

I like these:

With a grilled ham 'n swiss.

So....what's your favorite salty snack? Do tell.....

So said Peaches on the topic of "Questions" & "Yummy"
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I am constantly amazed by the stupidity of people that don't strap their young kids in for car rides. Even short car rides. Like from home to school, which is where a lot of accidents tend to happen because people aren't paying attention.

Case in point: Yesterday I was stopped at a stop sign on the way to pick up Scytheboy from school. The person that had the right of way was on a cell phone and had a young toddler in the front seat...standing up...and bouncing up and down on the seat.

She finally noticed I was waiting for her to go. She went, after switching the phone from one ear to the other. Then I went. I was driving the conservative 30 mile an hour speed limit. I glanced down to check the clock....and....when I looked up.....the lady was swerved half way in my lane and I was about an inch away from plowing in to her. She was noticed at the same time I did that I was in the lane and stopped at about the same time. She was still on the phone, and the kid was still bouncing freely in the front seat...on the side of the car that I would have hit if I had not stopped in time after she swerved into my lane.

But it was OK I guess because she put her turn signal on after we both had stopped so that makes everything all right....at least in her mind I guess it does.

I would bet this kind of thing happens to this woman ALL the time. And many others like her. To hell with safety....it's just so much EASIER not to fight with the kid about the car seat and to get calls done while they're driving to a friend's house. Doesn't matter if they swerve all over the road or their kid gets hurt due to their inattention...what matters is that THEY got where THEY needed to go with the least possible amount of inconvenience to THEM.

I knew this lady once who never strapped her kids in. Then we went to play racquetball at the base gym and she accidentally slammed into the wall. I casually mentioned to her that she was probably running less than five miles an hour, and think how hard someone would slam into a windshield during a wreck if they weren't strapped in. She really got her bell rung and I guess she put two and two together because the next time I saw her with her kids they were strapped in. And she was a die-hard "the government can't tell me what to do with my kids" type.

Although it's gotten better, unfortunately, there will always be those who either don't think it's necessary to strap their kids in because they were never strapped in, don't want to deal with the hassle of fighting with their kids to strap them in, or are in just too much of a hurry to strap their kids in for even the shortest trips...and ultimately some of the kids will pay the price for their parents' decisions not to be safe and they will get hurt in an accident caused either by their parent or another parent on a cell phone just not paying attention.....sad.

I know we don't all have kids, so if you don't this might not interest you. I ran across an article today that talks about Pediatricians actually "firing" their patients who either don't vaccinate or just partially vaccinate their kids.

To be honest, I have never understood the logic behind not vaccinating kids. I mean, it's been proved that these vaccinations, when given properly, go a long way toward protecting the individual kid from disease and also preventing large outbreaks of of these diseases in the general population.

I do think that parents who don't vaccinate are trying to do what they think is best for their kids, given the limited information they're working on that detracts from the practice.

However.....personally I think these parents are misguided. I've talked to more than one parent that does not vaccinate and their logic seems to be, "All the other kids are vaccinated, so there's really no danger of my kid catching anything from them or giving anything to them. I'd rather be sure my child is safe from autism or other vaccination related dangers and take the small risk of them getting some disease."

Small risk? Are these people not watching the news? I would guess that MANY of the illegal aliens and students that have illegally extended their visas in this country are not vaccinated against measles, mumps, rubella, chicken pox, hepatitis B, whooping cough, etc. Haven't we all read about recent outbreaks of whooping cough and measles in the news these past few years?

Yet, even given the overwhelmingly positive statistics for disease prevention and very minimal risk of giving their kids vaccinations, these people still choose not to vaccinate. I really hope that one day their kids don't have to pay the price for their parents' decisions when they come into contact with a fellow non-vaccinated kid and catch some disease that ends their life way too soon.

And I have to say that I agree with doctors firing parents with kids that don't vaccinate. Think of the risk these people bring into the office each visit....who knows what types of diseases they've been exposed to and are not immunized against?

Thoughts? Do you vaccinate?

Tommy's at training, so given that Scytheboy brought home a really good report card yesterday (at least that was my excuse for yesterday) I let him stay up late and watch T.V.

Well....he was watching in our bedroom so around midnight I went in to see what he was watching....it was Jaws 3.

Me: "What are you watching?"

Him: "Jaws 3."

Me: "Why are you watching that?"

Him: "Because I wanna see people get eaten by sharks."

Me: "Oh."

About an hour later, he came out and said:

"Okay, I've been watching for an hour, and not only have I NOT seen a shark, I haven't seen any people or anything else for that matter get eaten by a shark. I'm going to bed."

We all know how those Jaws movies are...you never really see anyone actually get eaten by the shark...it's just the whole idea of someone being eaten by a shark that's supposed to scare you...at least until the very end of the movie and then maybe you at least get to see a shark and a little blood or something.

But I must say I agree with Scytheboy....the only real reason anyone would watch a Jaws movie is to see someone get eaten by a shark.

I was going to file this under the Politics category as well, but it's more of a question each of us as parents have to ask ourselves. What brought this to mind is a case in Lexington, MA where a father is going on trial resulting from him disputing the 'right' of a local public school to introduce his then-5-year-old son to the issue of homosexuality.

Okay, so short version is the school sent home a "diversity bag" which included a book called "Who's In a Family?" which depicts same-sex parents alongside others. Now, first I have a problem with schools presenting any type of material related to family values without parental notification ahead of time. Second, who the hell teaches topics like this to a five year old? Five. Kindergartners are dealing with lots of changes at that age - being at school, making new friends, having to deal with more structure and discipline, how to hold their water until prescribed bathroom breaks...all of that. To then throw in the complex topic of family values and alternative lifestyles on top of it could, in my opninion, seriously screw up a kid's sense of reality.

I ask you....who teaches sex ed to a Kindergartner? Not me. The kid would have to be awfully developed, mentally, emotionally and physically to handle a convo. like that at such a young age.

Now, the dad did write an email to the school outlining his views. It says, in part:

It is one thing to endorse to not persecute/harm homosexuals/lesbians, it is another to teach young children implicitly that these values are acceptable. Some may maintain that if they can not present homosexual situations in school--- this is a form of persecution and harm. To us- this is a very contrived argument. The real question is-do parents have the right to exclude/shield their children from these contrary values being pushed upon young children in elementary school.

Clearly, the guy is upset and stands firmly on moral ground that does not jive with the school's "diversity" agenda. I can understand that. We all have our own set of values which we try and teach our kids in the hope that they will hopefully live according to what we feel is right and moral.

There are other things that go into this argument on both sides. Personally, we gave our child some guidance on this subject and the sex ed thing as a whole before the unit came up at school.....in 5TH GRADE!!!! Not Kindergarten, for God's sake. That way we could ensure he understood the basics and wouldn't have to be one of those "not in the know" during the unit, but also we took the opportunity to make sure he clearly understood what the terms meant, what we think of as a family, and how others may choose to live a different lifestyle which is their right to do and they should not be judged for it. So, for us teaching the basics, what we believe to be right, but also teaching tolerance was our approach.

I just don't think that schools should:

1. Develop a "Diversity" agenda and then expose five year olds to it without parental notification (note: our school gave us the option of pulling our son from the class if we chose to do so...but we're in TX, not MA and I know that's a difference).

2. Teach any type of sex ed related material to students of any age without parental notification BEFORE the course material is taught or provided in some type of book bag neatly packaged.

3. Teach that any life style is better or worse than another, regardless of pre-notification or not. This is the responsibility (in my view) of the parents. I have ALWAYS thought moral values should be taught at home. This should not be part of the school's course material - again, my opinion.

So...what do you think? Kindergartners? Classes and take-home materials on homosexuality and what all that means in the context of family? Proselytizing it is on even moral ground with more traditional families? Sex ed in general at whatever age without parental notification BEFORE it takes place? What do you think?

Okay, so Tommy's been whining about being sick over at his site. He's usually not a whiner so this is highly unusual for him. He is a prior military pilot and current private sector pilot, so for him to actually admit that he's sick is a very, very BIG deal. And for him to go to the doctor is an even bigger deal. Trust me. I've known several pilots all the way up to the Colonel level in the Air Force who live with chronic pain and rarely see doctors, claiming they are not "sick".

And I can truly say that he is, without a doubt, sick. I saw the patient form....it said "Influenza". They even gave him that special new influenza mediation that kills the virus instead of masking the symptoms...so we now just have to wait for it to kill the virus.

He's been sick since Monday and finally went to the doctor today (Thursday) after only getting worse instead of better. So for the past few days I've been thinking about how we "do sick" differently. Following is a comparison of how we each react to being sick:

Him: "I'm sick. Leave me alone. If I need something I'll let you know."

Me: "I'm sick...I need everything. Anything you can think of, I need."

Him (after four or five days of being sick): "I guess I should go to the doctor."

Me (on day one or two): "I feel like shit. I'm going to the doctor."

Okay, so now we've covered generalities on how we each treat being sick. Further generalities on him include staying by himself where nobody will bother him, drinking large quantities of Diet Coke, and eating what's been put before him as long as it's not too healthy. Junk food and favorite foods rule the day when Tommy's sick. I'm sure that's the same for most of us.

Now, for me here is a detailed list of what I need when I am sick:

1. An immediate trip to the doctor and lots of prescription medication...lots and often.

2. A couch all to myself in front of the T.V. with my favorite blanket.

3. Peace and quiet so I can take naps frequently. I hate for it to be loud when I'm sick. Could we all please just walk around silently in reverence of my sickness? Please?

4. I like to be checked on often in case I need anything...like some water or some tea or maybe some toast.

5. A cold hand or a cold compress for my feverish forehead. I like cold compresses. They're nice.

6. My cat. Purring. Close to me. That's always good when I feel bad.

7. TiVo. In case I fall asleep during the show I can rewind.

8. McDonald's at least once a day. What is it about McDonald's that always makes me feel better?

9. A warm (not hot because it will make me too nauseous) bath at least once a day. I hate feeling "icky" from laying around all day on the couch.

10. Someone ELSE to decide what I'm going to eat...I'm too sick to decide. Besides, I always have to decide and it's my only chance to have someone else decide...except when I want McDonald's. Then I want that and nothing else. That's the only exception to the whole me not deciding what's for dinner thing.

11. Lots and lots of sympathy. Everyone should recognize how horrible it is that I'm sick and tell me how much they wish I felt better.

12. Hugs from my son. This should really be no. 1, but he's in school now so it has to move to the end of the list unfortunately.

Okay, so as you can see I really don't need very much when I'm sick. Just the normal stuff anybody needs when they're sick. I really don't understand the whole "I'm sick. Leave me alone" thing. I guess in the area of how we treat being sick, you can really say in our case opposites attract.

So...share....how do you do sick?

Tommy is out of town, and of course once again I resorted to McDonald's for our "wholesome" family meal while he's away. So, we got in the car last night and drove down to our favorite location for a bite to eat. While we were waiting at one of the busiest intersections in our 'burb, I glanced up and noticed that there were four or five people that appeared to be panhandling for money on the median. They were walking up to all the cars pleading for a helping hand. A couple of them had things written on their buckets like, "I've lost everything, please help."

There were several thoughts Scytheboy had on this. From my perspective, if these people are indeed hurricane victims I do certainly understand why they would feel so desperate for funds. But also I realize if they are legitimate victims they have access to free food and shelter, donated clothing, and also opportunities for more permanent housing with a $600/mo. stipend plus thousands of dollars from The Red Cross and FEMA in the form of debit cards. So why this? Scytheboy said, "We don't know who these people really are or if they were victims. They're probably from Dallas and are just trying to take advantage of the situation." That said, of course we didn't directly donate to hurricane relief last night.

Now....here's the question. Would you open your window and hand over a few bucks to these people that appear to be so needy? Or would you rather do like most of us have and donate to a reputable charity?

I'm curious to hear what you'd do if confronted with this situation, or what you have done if you've already had to deal with it. As a side note, a police car drove up and these people scattered as quickly as they could, jaywalking all over the intersection. So at the very least they probably didn't have licenses to solicit.

Thoughts?

Lately, I've noticed I'm wearing a lot of gray t-shirts. Recently I cleaned out my closet and color coded the t-shirts (shut up, I am NOT anal). It so happens that the gray ones are at the front of the line, right behind the white ones (yes, they're organized light to dark - again, I am NOT anal!). Feeling gray again yesterday, I decided to actually count how many gray t-shirts I own. I looked in my closet and I counted 12 of them....lined up all nice and pretty in a row, right in front of me. Some of them I've had for 10 years, some of them I've had just a year or two. But they are all still gray, in various stages of fading. Just so you know - I did NOT arrange them from light gray to dark gray. That proves I am not anal - just very, very organized.

I'm considering going dark to light on the color coded/organizational scale thing so as to add more variety to my daily wardrobe. It turns out I have much fewer same color other color t-shirts than I do gray ones.

Anwyay....I am curious, so your question is.....how many gray t-shirts do you own?